Luke Died
by Anavela
Summary: Lorelai finds and interesting excuse to get out of a Friday night dinner with her parents.


Luke is Dead?

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gilmore Girls**

**AN: Sorry, this isn't the funniest story ever. It's my first one, and I'm still learning how to use everything. **

Lorelai plopped down on the couch. She was exhausted from a long day of work, and now she was depressed that her day still wasn't over. It was a Friday night, and that meant dinner at her parent's house. All she wanted to do was close her eyes, but no matter how much she wanted to, she couldn't. There was no way out of it. It was the agreement she made to keep Rory in Chilton, and she wasn't about to give that up. Besides, Rory loved the Friday night dinners with her grandparent, no matter how many horrible things her mother had told her about them.

There was however, one way to get out, but Lorelai had used that one way to many times. And she knew if she called and told her parents that, they wouldn't believe it anymore. Lorelai was the boy who cried wolf. She told them she had been sick so many times that it wasn't even funny anymore. Now, if she ever did get really sick, she'd be screwed.

"Mom, I'm home!" Rory greeted slamming the front door shut behind her. "Where are you?"

"In here, sweets!" Rory hung her coat on the rack and entered the living room where her mother was sprawled out on the couch, looking extremely sad.

"What's the matter? You look like you should be doing one of those depression ads."

"Huh?" Lorelai looked up at her daughter, only to return her eyes to the ceiling again.

"Why so gloomy?"

"I'm not feeling well."

Rory rolled her eyes. "Oh, no, not that again. Grandma's not going to be happy if I show up alone."

"I would have thought she'd be thrilled with me not being there. I am, after all, such a disappointment to her."

"You are not, she loves it when your there."

"Oh, really. I believe that last conversation I had with her was about how I should have gone to college. And the week before that, we had a nice little argument on how I should dress more nicely. I also remember you backing her up on that."

"What, I did not. I simply said that it wouldn't hurt if you wore some of your nicer clothing when we visit them." Rory defended herself.

"But that defeats the whole purpose of our plan to dress so badly that it leaves them speechless." Lorelai whined.

"No, there is no 'we' in that little idea of yours. I, unlike you, want to stay away from grandma's bad side."

"Ugh! Have I taught you nothing? You are supposed to be rude and wear clothing that they disapprove of so that hopefully, they'll call off those damn Friday night dinners, and so that I won't be sitting here thinking up semi painful ways to kill myself in less then an hour!"

"First, you know grandma would never cancel the dinners, and second, it's not that bad! We go, we eat, we leave. It's that simple, and it doesn't last more then an hour or two. Plus, it's one day out of the entire week. Just one day, so get over it already!"

Ignoring everything her daughter just told her, Lorelai smiled as an idea popped into her head. "What?" Rory asked, not really sure if she wanted to hear the answer.

"I just thought of the greatest idea! It will probably get us out of the dinners for at least two weeks, three tops." Lorelai couldn't contain her excitement.

"Mom, if your going to ask me to hurt you in some way, let me just save you some time. No! And if your thinking about sitting in ice cold water, trying to get hypothermia again, I'm…."

Lorelai cut her off. "No, I'm not doing any of those, but you have to admit, that hypothermia was a good idea. And if you hadn't dragged me out, we wouldn't have attended that dinner."

Yeah, your right, we wouldn't have. You know why? Because you would have bee dead!!!!" Rory yelled furiously.

"Yeah, but this time, I won't be the one getting killed. It's perfect!"

Rory took a seat on the edge of the couch, as her mother sat up. She sighed, knowing whatever great idea that Lorelai had, wasn't a good one. Maybe to Lorelai, but not to any sane people. "Okay, spill. What's the great idea?"

"Okay, I'll tell you, but first, you must promise to go with me on it. I'm going to need your help to pull this off."

"Fine! Just tell me."

"Okay, here it is. We call my parent's and tell them someone died. But it has to be someone close to us. Someone that they've met before."

"Oh, god. Why did I agree to this? Why? I should have known that you would think up something like this. Mom, this is crazy." Rory expressed her feeling, but Lorelai didn't care.

"So we've got to find the person, and then come up with the way they died. I was thinking like a heart attack or maybe a murder, or death by choking." Lorelai laughed. "That sounds funny. A murder in Stars Hollow."

By now, Rory was shaking her head. She just hoped that her mother was kidding. "Mom, come on. We have to get ready." This sentence pulled Lorelai out of her thoughts.

"Rory, I can't pass up a ticket to get out of Friday night dinners. That's just not me. And it's not like we haven't done anything similar to this before. Remember David?"

Rory searched her mind. The name rung a bell. Rory was in third grade when she missed a day of school. She wasn't sick, Lorelai just wanted to give her the day off. Well, one day led to a whole week. When she returned, Lorelai gave her a note to give to the teacher. It read that Rory missed school on a count of her uncle, David Gilmore, dying. And it worked. Plus, the teacher was really nice to her, because she felt sorry.

The weeks following that, Lorelai kept cracking jokes about how she once had a brother.

"But that was different. This is Grandma we're talking about." Rory told her.

"No, Rory, come on. You said you were with me. Now, who do you think should die?" Another idea quickly popped into Lorelai head again. "Oh! Has mom met Kirk? 'Cause if she has, then there is really no need to explain why he's dead. It's perfect." Her laughing increased.

"Mom."

"Oh, I could tell her that Michele died. She's met Michele and she knows I work with him. Although, she did kind of like him, so if I tell her that I killed him because he was being annoying, she'd probably get mad. Plus, I'd probably get arrested because she'd call the cops on me. Although, I'd still get out of dinner, which makes it totally worth it!"

"Mom! Stop! We are not going to do this. It's crazy! Now, let's get dressed." Rory stood up, only to be pulled back down.

"Rory…don't you see….this…could be great." Lorelai said between laughs. "You could catch up on homework, or go out with Lane. I'm not the only one who would benefit from this."

"I know, but mom, really, come on. This is silly. And it's way bigger then all the lies before. I'd feel horrible."

"Too bad! You already agreed." Rory sighed. "Now, who do you think it should be?"

"I don't know, and I don't care. I'll go along with it, but I won't take any part in anything else."

"Fine, I'll decided then. Okay, so who have I come up with? Kirk, Michele…. umm…." She searched her mind for people her mother met before. Only one person came to mind. "Luke!"

"No, not Luke!" Rory complained.

"Hey, I thought you weren't going to be a part of this."

"I'm not, but you can't kill Luke. And what if she ever decides to make a visit down here again, and happens to see the person that's supposedly dead. What are we going to do then? Huh?"

"Well, I haven't exactly gotten to that part yet, but she never comes down here anyways, so that shouldn't be a big problem."

"Okay, but like I said, don't kill Luke."

"Why not? He's met Emily before, and she thought that we had something going on. That would make this plan great. Because she'd expect me to be grieving and crying and everything. It's perfect!" She said, smiling like crazy.

"This just seems so wrong. No, wait, it is wrong. We can't pretend that someone's dead. Especially Luke. That's just….wrong!"

"Nice vocabulary."

"Well, your craziness has left me at a loss for words!"

"This is not craziness, this is fun, and exciting, and a great way to get out of dinner!"

"You need to see a doctor."

"No, the voices in my head say that's a bad idea."

Rory put a hand to her head. "I give up. You do what you want. I'm going to my room." She stood up off the couch and looked down at her watch. "And oh, by the way, you've got less then thirty minutes to come up with a plan and call them. I'm going to get ready just in case."

"There is no 'just in case'! We aren't going to go, so it'll be pointless to get dressed up!"

"Whatever psycho!" She yelled back, and then slammed her bedroom door closed.

"Okay, so Luke it is. Now, how'd he die? Heart attack? No, he's too healthy. Murder? Maybe, but there has never been a murderer in Stars Hollow…so far. Death by choking? Okay, that was a bad idea. Mom would never believe that. It has to be something like…like a fire!"

Rory could hear her mother mumbling something to herself in the living room, but she couldn't make out the words. However, the last three words she said were perfectly clear. Rory shook her head in disappointment and proceeded to get dressed.

"That's perfect! Great, all I have to do is call and tell them. I wonder if I can fake cry." She thought out loud. "Rory! I have it! If you're ever asked, Luke died in a fire after saving someone's life. He was visiting his sister, saw a burning building, and then decided to go in!"

"Psycho!" Rory responded.

"I love you too!" Lorelai said and then reached for the phone that was laying the table. Rory came back out of her room a couple minutes later. She took a seat next top her mother as Lorelai dialed in the numbers.

Both her and her daughter sat in silence for a moment before one of the maids at her parent's house picked up the phone. "Hello?"

"Um, yeah, can I speak to my mother. This is Lorelai Gilmore."

"Hold on." Lorelai could hear some talking going on in the background and then not even two seconds later; she heard her mother's voice.

"Lorelai?"

This was it. She had to put on her best crying voice, which was going to be really hard because she couldn't help but laugh. "Um, yeah, mom, we're not coming to dinner tonight."

"Why?" Emily's stern voice asked.

"Um…Luke…he died…in a fire."

"What? When did this happen."

"We um, we just got word form his sister a little while ago."

"Well, are you okay. Do you need me to come over or something. You sound horrible." Lorelai clearly hadn't thought about how her mother would react, and her plan was starting to backfire.

"No, I've got Rory here, we're fine. I just…need some time." She said quickly.

"Okay, well if you're sure. Lorelai, I'm sorry. I know you liked him."

As this was said, Lorelai started to realize how right her daughter had been about how this was so wrong, but she couldn't turn back now. Nope, she got herself into this lie. "Yeah, but really, I think I'll be okay. I just need to think things over. Both Rory and I are alright, though."

"I guess I'll talk to you tomorrow then. I'll call around afternoon time and see how you're doing."

"Okay, that's sounds good. And I think we'll see you next week, or maybe the week after that depending on how things go."

Emily didn't exactly know what to feel about Luke, but she did feel bad for her daughter, so she gave in. "Okay, whatever times best for the two of you."

"Okay, thanks. Bye." Lorelai quickly hung up the phone and stared blankly ahead of her. "I feel bad." Lorelai smiled. "Okay, that was a lie. I don't feel bad, maybe a little but three weeks of not seeing my parents will help me through it." She laughed again.

Rory was shocked. One, she never thought that this would work, and two, she never knew how good of an actress her mother could be. Lorelai literally had some tears in her eyes as she was talking over the phone. Well, not really tears, but her eyes really glassy. "Wow." Was all she said.

"I hope she doesn't come visit us." Lorelai said.

Rory smiled a little, even though she felt bad about the situation. "Well, if she ever does, and she sees Luke, we'll tell her that he has a twin, or that he works for the CIA and had to fake his own death."

"Oh yeah, she'll fall for that." Lorelai leaned back into the couch. "I guess I get my Friday night off then." She closed her eyes, laughing a little.

"Wow, we are horrible people. But, at least I can get a head start on my homework." Rory sighed, changing her mood again. "God, I'm disgusted with myself. I'm doing my homework while my grandmother thinks I'm grieving."

"Well, if your really feeling bad about this whole thing, you can go ahead and grieve anyways. You know, walk around the house really depressed, don't talk to anyone, fake cry once and a while. It'll give you some practice for when we do visit your grandparents."

"I'm not going to grieve about someone who isn't dead yet. That's seriously messed up."

"Yeah, well, if you don't, Emily will get suspicious."

"I think if we show up next week, we can probably get back to our normal routine. Grandma will think we weren't that attached to him. If we prolong this, she'll send you to a therapist or something."

"Rory, sweetie, trust me, if my mother were to ever send me to a therapist, it would have been years ago."

"Yeah, your right. So, want to go to Luke's?"

Lorelai's eyes opened up again. "Yeah, let's go."

After arriving at Luke's, both Rory and Lorelai paused outside the door. Lorelai was trying to contain her laughter, and Rory was again, rolling her eyes. A little part of her wanted to laugh though, and she knew she would eventually. Living with her mother was always interesting.

The stepped inside and took a seat at one of the tables. A few minutes later, Luke came up to them. "You guys do know that it is a Friday night, don't you?"

"Yes." Lorelai tired her best not to laugh. She compromised it with a smile.

"So, what happened. Your parents out of town or something?"

"No, they're still in Hartford." Rory told him.

"Then how'd you get out of going. It must have been a really good excuse." He guessed.

"Yeah, it was. Someone died." Rory told him, her small smile turning into a huge grin.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Was is someone close."

"Really close." Rory said, referring to how small the distance was between Luke and them.

"Who was it?" He asked curiously.

At this point. Lorelai broke out laughing. Luke was stunned and confused. "I'm no expert, but aren't you supposed to be grieving after someone dies?"

"Yes, that's what most people do. However, our situation is a little different." Rory chimed in again.

"How?"

"Well, the person that died, isn't actually dead." Lorelai calmed down a bit and finally lifted her head.

"What?" Luke asked.

"Or at least we think you aren't. Your not, are you?" Lorelai finally spoke up while still laughing. Rory joined in.

Luke was following absolutely nothing. His facial expression showed that. "What?" He asked again.

"Well, don't you remember? You died in a fire."

"Again, what????"

"Mom decided she didn't want to go to dinner tonight. So, she called up grandma and grandpa and told them you died in a fire, after saving someone's life." Rory explained.

"You told them I was dead just to get out of dinner?"

Lorelai nodded. "Yep. None of the other excuses would work."

"Your crazy. Both of you." He said, as he walked away form the table.

"Hey, at least we didn't say you were murdered. We gave you some dignity!" Lorelai yelled at him. He ignored her.

"He now officially thinks you're nuts." Rory informed her.

"As long as he still brings me coffee, I'm fine with that." She laughed again.

A couple minutes later, Luke appeared beside them again, placing one plate and one mug in front of each of them. "Thanks Luke." Rory told him.

"Yeah, thanks." Lorelai said, quickly grabbing her warm mug, and then taking a sip of what she thought was coffee. However, this coffee had a chocolaty taste to it. She swallowed it, and then glared over at Luke, who was smiling away. "Luke!" She yelled. "That's it, your dead…again!!! She stood up out of her chair and walked behind the counter.

"Hey! You can't go behind the counter." Luke walked up to her. Lorelai ignored him, as she grabbed a new mug and began filling it with coffee.

"I can when you give me something I never asked for." She told him.

"Technically, you never asked for anything."

"He's got you there." Rory said.

"Hey! You're supposed to be on my side."

"Why?" Rory asked.

"Because I gave birth to you, that's why!"

"Okay, argue in front of the counter." Luke directed her back to her seat. Lorelai sat back down and took a sip of her coffee. She looked over at Rory who was sipping her own mug.

"Hot chocolate?" Lorelai guessed.

"Coffee." She informed her mother.

Lorelai's moth dropped open. "Hey! You gave her coffee and not me?"

"You told your mother I was dead." He shot back, as he served some other customers.

"Rory helped." Lorelai whined.

"Yeah, well you're her mother. It's your fault she's the way she is, not hers."

"Fine." Lorelai sighed. "But your still dead for that hot chocolate prank."

"Yeah, okay."

"I mean it. You should be very afraid."

"Whatever."

"David was."

"Who's David?" He asked, confused.

"Exactly." Lorelai replied, smiling.


End file.
